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July 14, 2010 / natihell

The Glamourai, Why?!

I’ve been reading this blog for a long time now, and most of the times I don’t find it annoying. The girl who writes The Glamourai is named Kelly, she makes pretty (but a bit overpriced) jewelery and she’s always babbling about how glamorous she is.

She’s pretty fine,I find her blog very enjoyable, but she doesn’t escape from being a complete asshole sometimes, like when she calls her boyfriend “glamourguy”, or her sister “glamour jr”, or her dog “glamourrabbit”. Look sweetie, the fact that you’re constantly telling people how glamorous you are, doesn’t actually make you glamorous, it makes you a bit of a douche. That’s pure “DERP DERP DERP” material.

Her latest post “{a new lease} on legs” is the biggest prove of her douchebaggery. Here, she talks about how much she hates jeans because they aren’t glamorous.

“in a way, i actually envy girls for whom throwing on jeans is as routine as brushing teeth. truth is, there’s no other garment that causes me more dressing-room anxiety. i find them very hard to wear! how do you make them elegant? breezy? soft? textured? glam?!?! i’m much more at ease in charmeuse and chiffon.”
Oh …wow. That’s intense.
I don’t know what to think about a person who gets so heavily confused about jeans. Is she pretentious? Is she dumb? Is this what she really thinks about jeans or is she pretending, just to increase her glamorous credibility? It’s ok if you don’t like to wear jeans, but come on, no one gets anxious about them. All this “OMG! Jeans aren’t glam! What can I do?!” bullshit is not believable.

derp??

I thought it couldn’t get worse, but then I read this:
“and yet, i guess there’s an ornery little girl still living inside me, who needs to rebel against my own norm now and then. so, every once in a while, i sneakily slide on a pair of jeans, strut around feeling brassy and bold… and then slither back into my gauzy, girly stuff, feeling just as empowered as before ~ if not more.”

Oh! Aren’t you a sneaky little thing? Struting around in jeans,! You’re a true rebel, you’re a warrior. Jeans… that takes BALLS. That’s the cure for depression right there! Come on everyone! Let’s “throw on” a pair on jeans and feel empowered and brassy and bold!

Dear Glamourai: Why do you need to convince people that you’re glamorous? Why do you get so confused about jeans? Do you need some kind of special help for your jeans anxiety? Why do you talk about girls who wear jeans in such a pejorative way? Go back to putting chains on your rat/dog glamourrabbit.

"so the girl likes jewelry?! the apple never falls far from the tree." You know you're not really the dog's mom, right?

And by the way, people don’t “throw on” clothes, they “wear” them or they “put them on”, stop talking like a moron.

Love,

Nati Hell.

PD: On the bright side, she has a very beautiful face, and most of her jewelery is really nice. And by the way, all of this pictures are property of The Glamourai, probably taken by the Glamourguy with a Glamcam when they were going to have some Glamourlunch in a Glamourrestaurant with some Glamourfriends.

18 Comments

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  1. Sister Wolf / Jul 14 2010 5:28 am

    The real horror is her writing. Why must these people add prose to their photos when they just can’t write? It is painful to read this kind of crap. (The “for whom”) made me wince.)

    • April / Sep 10 2010 3:28 pm

      “for whom” is just grammatically correct…

  2. Just Not Glamorous Enough / Jul 14 2010 10:27 pm

    Wow, your write-up was priceless. I wear jeans all the time. I didn’t realize what an unglamorous rebel I was.

  3. All / Jul 15 2010 7:52 am

    Haha hilarious observations, I wish I had found this site earlier!! I only found it today because I stubbled across a tweet from a young blogger here in Australia http://www.wekilledcouture.com/
    who called you the “biggest asshole on the internet”, naturally I had to find out who this was and I have been laughing all afternoon.

    • natihell / Jul 16 2010 5:20 am

      Hahaha that’s so funny! Thanks for letting me know. And I don’t think I’m that much of an asshole haha, I try to say nice things about each blog I read.
      Love, Nati.

      • Madeleine Louise / Jul 16 2010 6:17 am

        hhahaha it’s funny, some of it very true… but still an ass hole.

  4. june / Jul 16 2010 8:09 am

    her blog shits me to tears

  5. Lol / Jul 16 2010 1:58 pm

    Haha, I found this blog the same way. I read through the entire thing while trying to hold back uncontrollable laughter from inside my cubicle. You might even be my new hero?!? woah.

    Don’t get me wrong, I love reading these fashion blogs as much as the next person, but some posts are so cringe inducing… someone had to say something.

  6. min / Jul 17 2010 1:18 am

    I am drawn to this blog like a car crash…what are your thoughts on Style Scrapbook?

    • natihell / Jul 17 2010 6:39 am

      She’s like,.. tofu. Boring and tasteless. Not bad, but far from good.

  7. All / Jul 17 2010 5:38 am

    You need to grow up Madeleine louise! It’s funny that anyone who disagrees with you is a bad person. Your blog is boring and it shits me to tears too. Thank god there are people around who can actually articulate how boring and self absorbed some fashion bloggers are and that is funny and clever unlike so many of these vapid girls taking photos of themselves or worse getting their friends to take photos and calling it a “photoshoot”, no it is your friend taking crappy stupid photos of you!

    • natihell / Jul 17 2010 6:36 am

      Am I the only one who thinks that this Madeline Louise person is a Luxirare wannabe?
      Hahaha I haven’t even written about her and she’s going all crazy and offended.

  8. All / Jul 17 2010 3:51 pm

    I think someone must have criticized Madeleine’s blog, I went there and had a look but there wasn’t much criticism so I don’t know what her problem is! Typical of some of these girls who expect everyone to leave gushing comments about them. It’s funny she dislikes you so much since you have never said anything about her but you are so right, she is a Luxirare tryhard

  9. Annie Owen / Jul 19 2010 10:10 am

    This is such a breath of fresh air – I am a blogger but hardly ever do outfit posts – or moan about how it’s so upsetting to be unable to wear jeans!! That is slightly ridiculous, I agree she is beautiful but her stress about a pair of jeans makes me think she just needs to chill out a bit and not take herself so seriously! She’s probably one of those annoying people who can just ‘throw on’ a pair of jeans and they’d look lush anyway!

  10. Jo / Sep 30 2010 7:39 pm

    Questions:
    How many of you guys have your own jewerly line. How many of you can transform something old, broken, into something beautiful as this girl can do? How many of you have designed a bag for a retail store? Or have got paid to give your opinions on someone’s else wardrobe. How many of you are self-employed a do what you really love to do??
    I bet you think is perfectly fine to throw some sweat pants, a hoodie and sneakers because they are “comfortable” to go pretty much anywhere! And somehow that is ok and accepted. Kelly has an AMAZING eye for beauty. She is an artist, a designer. What if she is not a noble prize writer? I don’t think she’s trying to. She writes about what she’s good at and she’s showing the world a much prettier, happy and wonderful side, one that obviously we are not use to see.

  11. Faith / Feb 2 2011 7:27 pm

    I love this! And I completely agree. Stopped reading her blog ages ago… too snobby.

    ~F

  12. Terri / Feb 4 2011 8:17 am

    I love The Glamourai’s blog but I have to admit I actually burst out laughing loudly from this post.

  13. glenn / Aug 8 2011 9:28 pm

    you remind me of southpark nati 🙂

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